my best friend is getting married in may. she threw me a shower for little bit and has just been there through everything the past few years. i (on the other hand) suck as a friend, feel like my friends are too clingy if they call every single day, and start ignoring their phone calls. this has happened with her on more than one occassion but i've done better since i realized that i do this (about a year ago now).
anyway, that was really beside the point but just fyi. so, we were looking at bridesmaids dresses online on new year's eve and found several really cute ones. the issue is that i'm the smallest of the bridesmaids (and i'm not too small myself) and the biggest of them is pretty big and has enormous boobs. several of us (there are 6 total) don't like to be hanging out to the world but a few of the others do. so anyway we decided no halters, no strapless, no fitted, with full backs, and as cheap as possible (definitely not more than $150). and they're going to be black so how much more flattering can you be? she said if we couldn't agree on one, she'd do the mix and match and let us pick the top. yippee. sounds great. so today they go dress shopping. i, of course, have a child, 2 jobs, and a husband and couldn't drop everything to dig through dresses so i chose not to go (was forced by my jobs and sick child actually). she told me yesterday "i know renee and becca are going to want strapless but we're not getting strapless." she calls me this afternoon:
her "what size dress do you wear?"
me "ummm...i lost 20lbs...i don't know" DUH
her "well...we need to come down here (an hour away) and get sized this week" LIKE I HAVE TIME FOR THAT
me "how about i get sized in town and call them"
her "ok...we found a dress...it's STRAPLESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (all the emphasis is b/c i'm mad...not b/c she was excited about telling me that)
me "i'm not wearing a strapless dress. i have broad shoulders. i've already told you that"
her "but it looks the best on maranda." WHO CARES?? I'M THE MAID OF HONOR (ok, that's really irrelevant but why did we even talk about what i want if it doesn't matter??????????)
me "how much is this going to cost?"
her "ummmm...well...it's $150"
me "so...i'm paying 150 for a dress that is strapless and i'm only going to wear one time?"
her "i'm sorry! it's the best we can do"

me...i'm TICKED!!!!!!!!! we have to buy these dresses (which i'd be ok with if i could wear it more than once), pay to have it altered, buy shoes, rent a tux (b's in it too) which i'm SURE they'll pick the best of the best, pay for a wedding gift, and throw her a shower. oooooooooooooooooo...i'm so mad...

i know i sound selfish. i'm sorry for that. i should be selfish. it is her day, her wedding, blah blah blah but i just can't help feeling this way.
i just needed to gripe. again, fyi: i suck as a friend.
loves and hugs and better days to everyone else!!