La Bella Vista

I am a recent college graduate but have chosen to primarily be a stay at home mom for now. I do work part time but thankfully my wonderful husband is able to keep my beautiful Little Bit. I have 2 cats whom I love VERY much!

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

another post! i'm on a roll!

little bit is still teething (or just generally cranky). she can't do anything at all without fussing about it!! thankfully, b has been home the last few days and i'm in an ok mood today so it isn't bothering me. hopefully it will stay that way :) a few things i keep forgetting to write about: she can "sing" jesus loves me (it really amounts to "jee jee jee jee" but she gets the beginning tune) and the backyardigans theme song (she just carries that tune--no words), she tells everyone she loves them "wub-u," she says "otay" for everything but has also recently started saying yeah or "wah." i love "wah!" it is my absolute favorite although i want her (eventually) to say yes ma'am.

my "friend" sara (i have to say that w/ quotation marks as i'm not really sure how i feel about our friendship at the moment) hasn't bothered to call me. she's been back 5 days, i asked her to call when she got back and she hasn't. i know she's back though. i saw her car at her workplace today. she was concerned enough to email me the first day of her honeymoon wanting to know what we needed to talk about but not concerned enough to actually call? i really think she knows what is going on and just doesn't want to talk about it.

my friend rachel (long time friend from high school that i only talk to twice a year or so but that i love and miss DEARLY) is getting married. i'm so happy for her but i really hope she doesn't ask me to be a bridesmaid. i might just be flattering myself even thinking that she would but i really hope she doesn't. i SOOOO don't want to be in another wedding.

my boss at CFA told me he would get me a new phone. i'm SO excited. i just hope he follows through with it. it is a SUPER nice phone (pda/phone w/ all microsoft programs, flip out keyboard, internet, etc). i'm excited about it.

did i blog about picasa last time? if not, go to google, search "picasa" and download it. it is the absolute BEST photo software EVER and it is SOOOOOO easy to upload your pictures to web albums to share them w/ friends. it is also SUPER easy to edit and add special effects to your pictures. for example--this picture is lillee (the not really but kind of honorary flower girl from the wedding). i took this w/ an awesome camera but in just regular color. i edited it w/ picasa...in about 20 seconds.

we have vacation coming up in a few weeks that i couldn't be happier about. we NEED it terribly bad!! the beauty of it is that my aunt and uncle live near a beach and we are going to stay in their house while they are away at camp! so it will be FREE :) plus, b's company pays his gas so it will also be FREE to drive! and i have Chick-fil-A coupons so again--we can eat for FREE. the best vacations are FREE :)

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

2 posts in one week! wow!

i am feeding my daughter cheerios and while i have a moment to think (in quiet) i thought i'd post (very quickly b/c i just noticed my battery is about to die).

per my last post--i have now moved from total anger to totally heartbroken and i'm still really confused. i don't understand what happened but i also don't understand the problem i have hanging onto friends. my best friend in the whole world in high school and i "split up" several years ago. she moved a few hours away and that was hard but we made it work for a few years. then we ended up in a heated argument stemming around my changing my major (she thought i was selling myself short), she moved and didn't bother telling me or giving me her new phone number, and things just haven't been the same since. we hardly ever talk now (like twice a year--MAYBE). after my 1st 2 years of college i met sara (the bride from the last post). she was in a serious relationship, i was married, her old friends were partying and weren't in serious relationships and we just kind of...worked. for about 2 years everything was great. then i got pregnant and hormonal and never wanted to talk on the phone (but selfishly always wanted someone to talk to me when i was ready) and things changed with her. but we talked it all out and i realized how much i stink as a friend (back to the selfish comment) and started to work through that. however, little bit came along w/i just a few months and i don't know what happened after that. i guess maybe she thought that i was too busy or she was intruding...i don't know. we still invited her over frequently but she would only stay a few minutes, she stopped asking me to go shopping or have my nails done or anything really. but her old friends had now settled down some and she started hanging around them again. then there's andi. we got close while i was pregnant (she was pregnant too) and after her little one was born, she stopped calling (little bit is 3 months younger than her's).

so i definitely see a pattern (life changes, friends change) but i feel like a friendship should withstand and pull through life changes! i am heartbroken to know that i may not ever have a lifelong friend again. how do i stop this cycle?

Friday, May 18, 2007

i'm back...and dumbfounded


i have been so terribly overwhelmed and busy lately. i haven't had time to do anything! sorry for the 1 person who reads my blog :) and this is little bit on her first bowling night. she actually did really well. we just passed her off a LOT
so let me update you on life:
1)Little bit is great. she is becoming ever increasingly a toddler. curious beyond belief, mischievous beyond belief, and adorable beyond belief. her speech is becoming quite good. i have a bad habit of saying "oh, God" and she repeated that the other day along w/ "oh my Lord." it is cute but i have to be careful :) this week "outside" has almost been perfected. i'm very impressed! she burnt her fingers last tuesday. i had gotten out of the car and put her on the ground. i told her to come to me (i was standing at the back door and she was near the front of the car) and she started walking. i turned to get the groceries out and she starts screaming. she stopped pretty quickly so i figured a pinched finger, no big deal. over the next half hour or so she'd grab her hand and cry. i finally looked really closely and realized there were blisters on her 1st 3 fingers. evidentally she grabbed my brake rotor. wednesday i put her down when i got her out of the car and she walked a good 5 feet away from the tire :) learned her lesson...she has also mastered the art of climbing stairs. she will still get nervous and get down and crawl but she can pretty much walk up them like a big girl.
2)i'm in a wedding tomorrow...yes, that wedding. we had the rehearsal dinner tonight and i got the biggest stab in the back i've ever had in my life (here i go whining again). she has been engaged for about 17months (longest engagement ever). before she got engaged, i was going to be her maid of honor (matron i guess actually), after she got engaged, it was still me. 6 or 8 months ago--still me as we talked about me having to walk up the aisle w/ her future father in law. tonight--i'm not the matron of honor anymore. i told my husband on the way to the rehearsal that i felt like a bad matron of honor b/c i don't have time to go hang out and pick out flowers, invitations, etc. and take care of my 18month old, my husband, and 2 jobs...it just can't happen. i told him that i wished she would've picked someone else but she didn't. she picked me and i hated i couldn't do more (i did throw her a shower). so we get there and the director is going over who goes where and looks at 2 girls and says "ok, renee-you're the maid of honor and rebecca-you're the matron of honor?" they both said yes. i turned and looked at my husband w/ the absolute most dumbfounded look i could muster. i couldn't believe it--still can't actually. i don't mind not being the maid/matron of honor but i mind not being let in on the secret. did you see the office last night? i guess i'm the secret matron of honor that no one else knows about. well, i resigned my name from the running anyway (didn't see the office? download it on itunes--it's worth it). i have never felt more humiliated, stabbed in the back, betrayed, let down, angry, you name it, i felt it! and what was i supposed to do? stop the whole thing and say something? embarrass her (or myself even further)? nope, i just had to stand there and seethe. i'm still seething. my insides are just burned up! and not only am i not maid/matron of honor--she picked 2 people over me and i am now the LAST bridesmaid (the one you don't really want but have to have so you stick her at the end). so i played the only childish card i could--she said "well, i'll see you in the morning" (we originally planned to be at the church around 11am to help her get ready and take getting ready pics, etc) and i responded w/ "we'll be here by 1" (meaning 1pm or the same time pictures start and we have to be there). and i say "we" meaning my husband and i b/c he's also in this disaster of a wedding. i wish i would've backed out when the dress issue came up. i'd just like one answer--when was i demoted from my post? has everyone known about this for awhile now and i was the only one not in the loop or is this a new thing? this will come up in a future confrontation...be on the lookout for that post. if her wedding wasn't tomorrow and i wouldn't freak her out, i'd be on the phone now (or 3 hours ago).

3)i saw shrek the 3rd tonight. it was cute. my husband and i figured while we had the babysitter for the night, we'd take advantage of it. i miss the movies. we went 42 times the first year we dated (yes, we were geeks).

4) we are still cloth diapering. i love love love it! and am SOOOOOO addicted.